A Shadow of Doubt

By Scott Coner

Country Artist

            It happened again to me today. Out of nowhere, a shadow of doubt grabbed hold of my mind. Shadows are sneaky in the way they fly around and show up uninvited and unannounced. I have always believed these pesky little varmints are sent up from the bowels of hell. They cause confusion and doubt. They too often cause us to challenge ourselves and sometimes even the ones we care about most. I’m not so sure that the best thing to do when this siege of darkness arrives isn’t to stop whatever it is we are doing and pray. Yeah, I know I’m a little bit old-school. But I believe in crying out to God. I believe that I am weak, possibly a little bit light-headed, and I know I need all of the help I can get from On High.

            So, there I was innocently sweeping out the barn near the horse stalls. I began to wonder what in the world it was I’m doing or trying to prove when it comes to my music. “You are such a fool. Nobody cares what you think, or write about. Nashville wants younger, good-looking people. You have already been told this by the professionals, and this is not new news.”

            I stopped sweeping for a minute and stared at the concrete floor. I leaned up against the back of the barn doorway leading out to the pasture and considered this for quite a while. I could see a hawk displaying his powerful wings at the bottom of the field near the creek. I could feel doubt begin to run through me like warm water. “Maybe I am crazy,” I thought to myself, “but I have put so much work and time into this. It’s what I am. It’s what I do. I didn’t choose this. It chose me.”

Scott Coner (Photo by Cynnamae Media Productions)

            I caught myself at that moment. I realized what had happened. I called on God to take care of those little doubts and went on with my business of cleaning out the barn. You see, I don’t play or write to impress people. I don’t live for something as fleeting as someone else endorsing what I do. Music and songwriting just happens to be what I do. By the very nature of itself, I find myself being put in front of people and allowing them to critique my every word. Every chord. Every song. But, as I gather my thoughts, I remember how this business of music makes me feel. The emotion that goes into writing a song can’t hardly be described. But, to me it is not unlike the moment you see the Grand Canyon or the ocean for the first time. It’s jubilant.

            As I write this blog, there is a teacher out there somewhere staring at an empty classroom wondering how in the world she can help her kids learn. She feels the shadow of doubt. Across that same town, there is a nurse compelled to crying all alone as she feels the hurt of some young family that just received the news about their ailing child. She wants to help. She wants to say something of value. But there are no words for this moment in time. She feels the shadow of doubt.

            Maybe you are the one that this article speaks to as the sun begins to fall and the day is nearly over. Maybe, you feel alone and doubtful. Maybe you wonder if the man you gave your heart to loves you as much as you love him. Maybe you looked in the mirror today and saw a slightly older face, or a little bit more gray in your hair. Just know that this is not what you really see. This is not what you really wonder. This is a full-frontal attack of doubt. Make no mistake about that. 

  Scott Coner's music video "Sanibel"

            We all walk the same roads I suppose. We all have so much to give, but often we don’t know how. We have something to say that someone else needs to hear, but we can’t find the words. We all have a song to write. Songs don’t always get written with guitars. They don’t always show up in perfect harmony. I know this because I have heard those types of songs before. I have heard my wife tell me she’ll love me until the end of time. I have heard my daughters tell me they love me. I have heard my mom tell me she loves me over the phone. There was no music when this happened. But, oddly enough, these have been the sweetest songs I have ever heard. Don’t allow the devil to stop you from what you need to do. You have something to offer. Tell the people you love just how much they mean to you. Allow your words to sound like a band of angels coming down. Grab your broom and sweep those doubts into the darkest closet you can find, and lock it with the promises of heaven.  Self-doubt has no power over you.       

         Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at www.Facebook.com/ScottConerMusic, www.YouTube.com/user/ScottConer, and www.ScottConer.com. Follow Scott at www.Twitter.com/ScottConer.

For Easter... Why I Wrote The Song 'One Out In The Crowd'

            “One Out In The Crowd” is an important song to me. Even though it has been a long time ago since I actually wrote the lyrics, they still paint a picture that never leaves me. My intention was to tell the story from an eyewitness’ point of view. In my mind, the one telling the story may have been a shepherd simply bringing his stock into town. As he enters the city, he notices commotion and asks what is going on. He is told that there is going to be a crucifixion. There is a man named Jesus claiming to be the Son of God, about to be put to death alongside a couple of common thieves. 

            The shepherd can’t believe it. He had actually listened to Jesus teach in his own village. He had seen this man raise a young girl from the darkness of death. The song hopefully takes the listener to a place that they can actually imagine Jesus crying out. I tried to allow for the specific events that happened on that day to be mentioned. When it all comes down to it, each of us is faced with the decision to humble ourselves before God. My intention was to step back and allow the story to tell itself.

            Years later, I included this song in a musical I wrote called “The Broken Seal”. My hope is to record the entire project as soon as possible and hopefully make it available for churches to use as an outreach program.

            The world seems like it is on fire these days. There is more evil out there than I can remember. But the one truth we all have at our fingertips is God’s promise. I hope we can all find some quiet time this Easter and think about the condition of our own hearts.

Take care,

Scott Coner  

Scott Coner ( Photo by Cynnamae Productions)

Boog A Dah... Boog A Dah (Look at that... Look at that)

By Scott Coner

Country Artist

         So, the other day Ray Stevens was on the radio singing one of his crazy classics called “The Streak”. Do you remember that song? It was funny probably because for some reason back in the '70s, people used to get naked and run around ball fields and such. I have no reason why they did this, they just did. I remember as a little boy wondering why “streakers” were always male. It seemed to me they could have made it a little more interesting for young, inquisitive minds like myself.

         So, my wife, Cyndi, is deep into this soulful classic singing along like she may have been one of the co-writers. But when Mr. Stephens sings “Here he comes... look at that... Look at that...", I noticed she had completely different lyrical parts. They “sounded” like “Look at that... Look at that”, but she sang “Boog A Dah... Boog A Dah”. I thought that it was the funniest thing I had ever heard. I laughed for days. She tried to tell me that she was 5 years old when the song came out, and she didn’t understand everything. That only made it funnier to me.

          Some of the lyrics from "The Streak" written and performed by Ray Stevens...

Oh, yes, they call him the Streak...
Look at that, look at that (My wife sings "Boog A Dah... Boog A Dah")...
He likes to show off his physique...
Look at that, look at that ("Boog A Dah... Boog A Dah")...
If there's an audience to be found...
He'll be streakin' around...
Invitin' public critique...

Cyndi Coner

         It’s kind of like those songs from the BeeGees on "Saturday Night Fever". Did anybody ever know what those guys were saying? I didn’t that’s for sure. Sometimes we can go for years and not know the real, solid truth about something. It reminds me of some old Chinese musical. I think it was called “Madame Butterfly”, but I’m not sure. I swear to God I never saw it. But the scope of the entire musical was this guy was married to this “woman” for a long time and never even knew he was married to a dude. I’m not sure how this happened, but I’m sure duct tape was involved. 

Scott Coner (Photo by Cynnamae Media Producations)

         I know, I know this is a stupid commentary. But the truth is, I had a slight misunderstanding about some of the lyrics in "The Streak" myself. Do you remember the part in the song where the man and his wife, Ethyl, are at the grocery store? Well, Ethyl takes her clothes off and decides to streak through the vegetable section. The man tells his wife to "Get your clothes back on you shameless hussey!" Well, I grew up with some older cousins, and they were all boys. I can tell you I thought he called her something else. But, it was one of my older cousin's that told me what that word was, and I was young and dumb enough to believe him... "Boog A Dah... Boog A Dah" for sure.

Ethel! Where you goin'?
Ethel, you shameless hussy!

Say it isn't so,
Ethel! Ethelllllll!!!

         Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at www.Facebook.com/ScottConerMusic, www.YouTube.com/user/ScottConer, and www.ScottConer.com. Follow Scott at www.Twitter.com/ScottConer.

Check out Scott's latest video, "Maybe She Lied".

 

Music Has Been My Golden Ticket

By Scott Coner

Country Artist

         I’ve been thinking about the journey so far a little bit lately. I sometimes find myself wanting to talk to someone about it, but there really isn’t anyone to talk to. The fact is, I can’t hardly believe what a cool trip it has been so far. I have written and recorded lots of songs, and the songs thankfully, keep coming.  I never dreamed how things would eventually turn out. I had walked away from the business a long time ago in order to raise my daughters, and somehow, the doors in Nashville allowed me back in.

          I would be lying if I told you it has been nothing but newly paved highway since I came back to the music business. There have been more than a few characters that truly needed a physical adjustment in order to overcome their evil ways. But those types of people are in about every circle I guess. They allow us to stay sharp and challenge us to find greener pasture without that type of static in our lives.

          I have stayed true to my own writing style, although I have written with a few other writers in Nashville who have opened my eyes in certain ways. But the truth is, most of my songs come from my own life one way or another. I don’t know if that’s a good or a bad thing, but that is the way it is. I walk around our farm, I drive the old country roads where I live, and I think about my life as I write. Sometimes, those songs come out in a discombobulated fashion that’s for sure. But they are from me, and that’s about the best I can do. 

(Scott Coner's "Nashville Song" offers insights into

the rough and tumble of Nashville's music industry.)

         Sometimes, not often, but sometimes I have wished I had been born different. It truly can be a little bit embarrassing when I admit what I do in music to certain people. I can see in their eyes the amusement as they ask themselves why I would possibly think anyone would want to hear me play or sing. They all respond the same way with a hateful-type smile, and they’ll begin to tell me about some drunken uncle they have that fancied himself a songwriter. I try to be respectful and allow them their little barb. Another fact is, most people from where I’m from don’t even know about my music. I don’t play the bars or clubs around where I live, because those people only want to hear cover songs all night. That would kill me pretty quickly to be honest.

         Those closest in my family, including my wife, daughters, and parents, are very supportive. But once you get out of that tight-knit circle, it may be fifty-fifty if some of my own flesh and blood doesn’t sit around hoping that I fail in one way or another. I think many of those people that I grew up around would be quite a bit happier if I would just shut up and drink the Kool–Aid like they did. Give up on my goals and grab a 12-pack on the way home from work like they do. They will be waiting a long while though, because I won’t quit until I have to be buried on a hill down the road from where I grew up. The fact is simple but missed by most. They only have a limited capacity when it comes to music. You are either a star like Tim McGraw, or you are a complete failure. That’s where they get it all wrong. The journey is part of the joy. The people, the ones who truly care about the songs. What about that part? Does this not matter to anyone but me?

         It is true that I have been blessed beyond my own imagination when it came to working alongside Tanya, or T. Graham, or even Charlie Daniels. But those weren’t the best parts for me. The evenings that I have spent walking the streets of Nashville getting ready for another recording or show have been the best part. Each of those moments had purpose and meaning to me. It is what I do, and there is nothing else. Those times that I spent getting prepared to do a project, or remembering the moment that a song was written, that is what gives me direction. I consider myself one of the most fortunate people on earth because of my family, and what few true friends I have, and of course this music. 

Scott Coner performs in Nashville (Photo by Cynnamae Media Productions)

         I remember everything about the journey. The times I have spent planning the following day with my wife on west end, or the long walks we took just talking with the Nashville skyline in the horizon. You see, music doesn’t just offer me the chance to play music itself. It offers me the freedom to step away from the world I was raised in and visit a different part of me with those that I care the most about. It gives me a break from normalcy. I have always joked with my wife that she validates me with others because of her striking beauty. I swear, I think when people see her with a simpleton, like me, they take a second to listen. They can’t help but be curious as to what she sees in me. What they don’t know about is what she and I have shared, what we have accomplished together. A very necessary truth is I wouldn’t be where I’m at without her. She has believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself. I just didn’t want to let her down or disappoint her in some way, so I have kept on pushing and going down the road even when there wasn’t a map.

         I love my life these days. Good things are happening for me in Nashville. But, in truth, they have always gone pretty well for me in that town. I have sat across some pretty fine dinner tables with candlelight staring at this woman that I love so much right there in the very heart of Music Row. We have had ice cream at Maggie Moo’s and visited our favorite bookstores. She has captured my music on film. We have taken drives looking at all of the natural beauty that the town has to offer. But mostly, we have had fun. We have made this road trip together, and I’m thankful for that.

         Music and all of her magic has given me something impossible to explain. It has been a true gift that I don’t take lightly. I just wanted those of you who follow my music and all of these other ramblings to know that, when you listen to my songs, I am somewhere smiling deep inside. I’m just thankful all over for the way things have gone. I wouldn’t change anything even if I could.   

         Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at www.Facebook.com/ScottConerMusic, www.YouTube.com/user/ScottConer, and www.ScottConer.com. Follow Scott at www.Twitter.com/ScottConer.

From Cattle Trucks and Tractors to a Brand New Idea

By Scott Coner

Country Artist

         A long time ago in a little town that has been gone for years, I was a stupid teenage boy in my very first rock band. At that moment in history, Bob Seeger, REO Speedwagon, and Skynyrd ruled the day. This was a pretty good thing because most of those songs were reasonable to play for those of us, like myself that were less gifted. We usually met at my house and would practice for hours out in the barn. Back then, we had to stand around one of our cars to hear one of the songs we were attempting to play. And let me tell you, an eight-track player really sucked if you needed to hear a little something more than once.

         We didn’t have much back in those days. I remember wondering what it was like to actually have a real PA system and not be forced to sing into a radio shack microphone and a ratty old bass speaker. In truth though, I think this is when I may have learned how to project my voice. It was kind of out of necessity because none of us had the sense to turn anything down, just up. We all wanted to be heard, but I think the only thing listening was the endless cornfields and maybe a few June bugs.

         I remember thinking about the potential throngs of girls that were going to identify with our awful sound. It was going to be epic. I would probably act like James Dean given the chance. I figured I would always be gloomy and distraught about society for some reason. As it turned out, I think I had more Don Knotts and Jerry Lewis in me than anybody cool like Mr. Dean. Whatever girls actually gave me the time of day probably just felt sorry for me because I had no game. 

Photo by Cynnamae Media Productions

         Those days and nights were full of music though, and all I really wanted to do was drive the country roads and dream about the future. I didn’t have much money then, so I got crazy good siphoning gas out of the cattle truck and case tractor. I remember watching my poor dad looking under the truck for dead grass trying to determine just where the gas leak was on the truck. I still feel guilty to this day about that, but at this point, maybe we should just keep that story to ourselves. He still has a little bit of fire in him.

          I don’t know what year it was, but I remember some kids over in Ohio got trampled to death because of festival seating at a “Who” concert. I also remember my mom daring me to ever go to another concert. I really don’t know how she didn’t make some connection with all of my concert t-shirts. Maybe she thought I got them at Val’s Department Store. I just don’t know.

         So, about this same time, I’m driving on syphoned gas to a Rossington Collins Band concert on a weeknight that I have sworn I would never attend. I’m a small, skinny little kid back then, so I easily worked my way all the way to the front of the stage. I couldn’t believe my eyes as Allen Collins, Garry Rossington, and Dale Krantz walked within feet of me. Gary stood there with his Les Paul on his shoulder and a cigarette hanging loosely out of his mouth, and he made James Dean look like Pee Wee Herman. “I have got to start smoking,” I told myself. But, then again, “Maybe I should wait until I can at least afford to buy my own gas, or I’ll blow myself up and then my dad will be mad.” Yes, I was a boy genius. 

 (The song "Full Throttle" will be featured on Scott's next album)

         Later that same winter, I saw Charlie Daniels at Market Square Arena. As he sang, “Million Mile Reflections,” I had tears in my eyes. When he and his band tore through “Legend of Wooley Swamp”, I lost my mind. It was then, that very winter, my young mind made itself up about my future.

         I have always thought I would have enjoyed a life in the marines, but I wasn’t sure I would get to see many women, and that was a deal-breaker for me. Now, I am aware I was wrong about this tidbit as well. Marines always have cool looking women. I also thought maybe I could do well in a few other fields, but it was music that owned me. It still does. I love everything about music. It takes me away from problems. It takes me back to a moment in time that I still miss. And it guides me in ways that are pretty hard to explain. Yes, I am fully aware that most of you felt this same way at sixteen, but you moved on with your lives. I can’t explain it, but I love it just as much today as I did way back then.

         I still need to work on that whole James Dean thing though. Problem is, I’m pretty happy most of the time, I don’t have cool hair, and I’d probably just crack myself up trying to be all serious.

         Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at www.Facebook.com/ScottConerMusic, www.YouTube.com/user/ScottConer, and www.ScottConer.com. Follow Scott at www.Twitter.com/ScottConer.

Photo of Scott Coner by Cynnamae Media Productions