All We Leave Behind

By Scott Coner

Country Artist

         When I think about a legacy, I think about the important things we leave behind. Those things that best describe who we are, who we were, what we stood for. Like you, I have seen my share of funerals. And it is certainly true that the older we get, the more opportunities we get to pay our final respects.

         These days when you walk into a funeral home, there is usually a television screen or two in the room on the outer walls that have a slideshow of the person’s life lying there in state. Sometimes, there might even be some music piped into the room that best represented the person’s life.

         One funeral that has always stayed with me was an old farmer who lived down the road from me. His name was “Junior”. He left behind three sons, two daughters, and his wife. This was and is a good family of farm people. Junior always used Case farm tractors on his farm. He was even a member of the antique tractor club in our area. Anyway, when I arrived at the funeral home on the evening of the “viewing”, I noticed both of Junior's Case tractors and a hay wagon were parked out back. I saw the slideshow about his life, his family, his commitment to the Baptist church, and I was overcome with warmth and respect for such a good man. Following the funeral the next day, Junior's casket was hoisted up onto the hay wagon and pulled back to our road to a small cemetery just down the road from me. When they lay Junior in the ground, some words were said, some bluegrass gospel was sung, and he was left to rest that afternoon. He had lived his life very well and left quite a legacy. His family still works the farm. 

Scott Coner's grandfather works the fields. (Photo provided by Scott Coner)

         My dad, Linville Coner, has accomplished about as much as any man I have ever known. He and my mom were married at 17 and 18 years old. They started with nothing. They both worked hard and saved every cent possible. My dad went through his electrical apprenticeship down in Ft. Myers, Florida, but in the early '60s, work was sparse in that part of the country. They moved to Indiana, but work slowed down again. Dad and his brother went to New York for two years and worked though the frigid winters and sent most of their paychecks back to their wives. Long story short, my dad worked his way up the ladder from an apprenticeship to one of the largest electrical outfits in the country. They didn’t just focus on volume either. They had millions of man hours worked without incident. They had many clients who stayed with them for years and years, and they had many employees who spent their careers with them. My dad and my uncle were an outstanding team. They are both strong and honest men. They lead by example. And when they retired, they walked away without owing anyone a single penny. Their work has affected our family for many generations to come. Quite a legacy if you ask me. 

Music Video: "Into The Clouds"

I wrote "Into the Clouds" on a Sunday Afternoon after leaving church. The promise of heaven is one that I believe in, but my heart struggles with the thought of one day passing from this earth and having to leave my family. I hope you all enjoy the song, and I hope you consider all of the love and acceptance Christ has offered all of us!

        When you think about your life, what is it that comes to mind? What stands out to you? What are you most proud of? Are you proudest of your children? Are you proud of your marriage? Are you proud of your career? These are certainly all things one could hang their hat on as far as a legacy goes. I, myself, can’t honestly sit here and tell you I have accomplished much in this world. Yes, I have helped raise two wonderful daughters. I have worked hard on my marriage. It almost fell apart because of me once, and I have never let my hand off of the wheel since. I am proud of what I have become. I have seen some very dark moments in my life. I have felt the breath of the devil at my back. But I forged ahead with my life and did my best to keep the most important components of my life in the center. I recognize that Christ is the center of all things, and I can accomplish little without His divine guidance.

Scott's wife, Cyndi (Photo by Scott Coner)

          So, all of this being said, my legacy truly is being a member of my family. I am a part of my grandparents on both sides of the aisle. I am a part of my mom and my dad. I am Cynthia’s husband. I am devoted to her, I lift her up in every way possible, and I adore her every move. I am the proud father of two wonderful daughters who have never given me any reason to be anything but proud of them. I am a Christian man. And I lastly, I am a singer-songwriter. It is my plan to leave a story of my life, my love, behind in song. I hope that my music is a part of some people’s lives. I hope my music feeds people in some way. Maybe, they will even read my books. My legacy then, is about a man who loved his God, loved his family, and loved his music. Through my daughters and my songs, I hope to live on for just a little while longer.

         What is it about you that we can remember? We all have something. We all are and were a part of this world. Think about it. Outside of your commitment to Jesus and your love for your family and friends, what else truly matters in the end?    

         Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at www.Facebook.com/ScottConerMusic, www.YouTube.com/user/ScottConer, and www.ScottConer.com. Follow Scott at www.Twitter.com/ScottConer.

Boog A Dah... Boog A Dah (Look at that... Look at that)

By Scott Coner

Country Artist

         So, the other day Ray Stevens was on the radio singing one of his crazy classics called “The Streak”. Do you remember that song? It was funny probably because for some reason back in the '70s, people used to get naked and run around ball fields and such. I have no reason why they did this, they just did. I remember as a little boy wondering why “streakers” were always male. It seemed to me they could have made it a little more interesting for young, inquisitive minds like myself.

         So, my wife, Cyndi, is deep into this soulful classic singing along like she may have been one of the co-writers. But when Mr. Stephens sings “Here he comes... look at that... Look at that...", I noticed she had completely different lyrical parts. They “sounded” like “Look at that... Look at that”, but she sang “Boog A Dah... Boog A Dah”. I thought that it was the funniest thing I had ever heard. I laughed for days. She tried to tell me that she was 5 years old when the song came out, and she didn’t understand everything. That only made it funnier to me.

          Some of the lyrics from "The Streak" written and performed by Ray Stevens...

Oh, yes, they call him the Streak...
Look at that, look at that (My wife sings "Boog A Dah... Boog A Dah")...
He likes to show off his physique...
Look at that, look at that ("Boog A Dah... Boog A Dah")...
If there's an audience to be found...
He'll be streakin' around...
Invitin' public critique...

Cyndi Coner

         It’s kind of like those songs from the BeeGees on "Saturday Night Fever". Did anybody ever know what those guys were saying? I didn’t that’s for sure. Sometimes we can go for years and not know the real, solid truth about something. It reminds me of some old Chinese musical. I think it was called “Madame Butterfly”, but I’m not sure. I swear to God I never saw it. But the scope of the entire musical was this guy was married to this “woman” for a long time and never even knew he was married to a dude. I’m not sure how this happened, but I’m sure duct tape was involved. 

Scott Coner (Photo by Cynnamae Media Producations)

         I know, I know this is a stupid commentary. But the truth is, I had a slight misunderstanding about some of the lyrics in "The Streak" myself. Do you remember the part in the song where the man and his wife, Ethyl, are at the grocery store? Well, Ethyl takes her clothes off and decides to streak through the vegetable section. The man tells his wife to "Get your clothes back on you shameless hussey!" Well, I grew up with some older cousins, and they were all boys. I can tell you I thought he called her something else. But, it was one of my older cousin's that told me what that word was, and I was young and dumb enough to believe him... "Boog A Dah... Boog A Dah" for sure.

Ethel! Where you goin'?
Ethel, you shameless hussy!

Say it isn't so,
Ethel! Ethelllllll!!!

         Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at www.Facebook.com/ScottConerMusic, www.YouTube.com/user/ScottConer, and www.ScottConer.com. Follow Scott at www.Twitter.com/ScottConer.

Check out Scott's latest video, "Maybe She Lied".

 

For Valentine's Weekend: 'I Worship Her... I Need to be Close to Her'

By Scott Coner

Country Artist

         It’s been over 20 years ago now, but I remember everything. The first time I saw her my whole world changed. I knew that somehow, I needed to impress this woman enough to marry me. I walked around in a cloud for weeks not knowing what to do. I was in a bad marriage, and I was having more trouble than you could imagine getting out of it. Cyndi was also in the final stages of a break-up. The timing couldn’t have been worse. But, this woman, this relationship, was worth fighting for. I needed her. I had never felt feelings like those, and I didn’t know how to act.

         We both grew up within just a few miles of each other, but the odd thing is I actually met her in Nashville. She had been working for a Christian record label called Brentwood Music. I had wanted to pitch some of my music to them, but since I was in the middle of a divorce, nobody wanted to talk to me too seriously. I wasn’t very bothered by this though, because I could have cared less for their label. I just wanted their blonde.

Cyndi Coner

         As a little boy, I used to go with my mom after school to make bi-weekly payments at a furniture store in our town called Barnes’ Furniture. It was owned by a very kind Christian man who really impacted me just to be around him. It turns out that this man was actually Cyndi’s uncle. I look at our old photos of our families, and it looks like we grew up with the same furniture. Another interesting fact about Mr. Barnes was that he had three daughters. They were all older than me, but they were crazy beautiful. These girls were Cyndi’s cousins. Turns out that this family has a very dominant gene of beauty. Not unlike my family’s genetic hair displacement or big ears.

         Early on, I was supposed to meet Cyndi in Nashville for dinner. I sat at the table for nearly an hour, and she didn’t show. I finally got up and went to the salad bar and found myself standing next to Carl Perkins. I was too troubled to even care, so I didn’t thank him for his contributions to music or offering me a chilled plate for my salad. I stormed out of the restaurant only to find Cyndi sitting all alone in a chair waiting for me to get there. I felt like such an idiot, but to tell you the truth, I bet she hadn’t been there long. Through the years, I have noticed that I sit around waiting on her quite a bit, but I don’t mind.

         Anyway, long story short, we found a way through the mess and ended up getting married. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t thank God for her being in my life. She has proved to be a perfect mother. She treats my parents like her own. And she actually loves me unconditionally, and I have no earthly idea why. I don’t deserve a woman like her. I lie in our bed at night and hold her. I feel her soft skin and soft hair while she’s there next to me, and I find myself smiling in the darkness.

          Through the years, I have made mistakes and let her down. It hurts me to think about it, because I care for her so much. But, I keep trying to show her in all kinds of ways how much she means to me. I have mentioned before that I worry about having to die some day because I just don’t want to be away from her, and I truly mean it. I don’t want to have to leave. Every day, every minute, matters more than I could say.

         Valentine’s Day is the mandatory, designated day to promise our undying love to someone. I have written many songs about my wife, but “Close to You” is one of my favorites. There simply is no way I can put into words how much Cyndi means to me. I believe she saved me from a miserable life and a terrible ending. All I wanted to say to her is, “Thank you for saving me from me." Without her, things would have gone much different. I would have been bitter, mad and lost. Instead, I’m happy, glad and found.

         I hope you like the song and video. But, more than that, I hope each of you has a special Valentine’s Day. If by chance this year finds you alone, don’t worry. I’ve had plenty of those, too. Your best bet is to wait until Sunday, go to the drugstore, and buy yourself some special chocolate on sale and wait around until the right person comes along. There’s somebody out there for all of us. I’m living proof of that.

         The first song I wrote about Cyndi was this one I am including. I haven’t recorded it, but I remember the lyrics. Maybe one day I can take it to the studio. I’m not sure how many songs people want to hear about my personal experiences.

“Seven Kinds of Ways”

Hey girl we’re about to be free

And I was wondering if you’d marry me

And give me a little girl

We’ll name her Emily Sae

And we’ll hold hands and ride swings in the park

And I’ll hold you when the world goes dark

And girl, I won’t ever leave

(Chorus)

But when you smile are you really laughing at me?

For being such a love-sick fool?

In just three days

I fell for you seven kinds of ways

And girl, my heart belongs to you

How’d you get those pretty brown eyes?

And girl can you sympathize?

You see, I’ve never felt this before

Everything’s not as it seems

And my feelings are here on my sleeve

All I can do is think about you

Girl, I’ll do anything you want me to do

(Lyric Copyright 2016 Scott Coner)

Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at www.Facebook.com/ScottConerMusic, www.YouTube.com/user/ScottConer, and www.ScottConer.com. Follow Scott at www.Twitter.com/ScottConer.

About My New Short Story 'When An Angel Cried'

By Scott Coner

Country Singer-Songwriter & Author

(Scott Coner will release the new short story "When An Angel Cried" at 1 p.m. CST Tuesday, Feb. 2, at www.ScottConer.com. The story is based on his heartfelt song and video about domestic abuse called "When The Angels Cry". In this blog article, he shares how this life-changing project came about. You can watch the video at https://youtu.be/SXUUgLl43TA )

         The characters in my song and short story on domestic abuse have been with me for a long time. Sometimes some of the people in my songs have a way of residing within me without anyone else knowing about them. They flash through my heart and mind without my beckoning them forward. They aren’t always welcome to be honest.

         I didn’t know for sure if I even wanted to record the song "When The Angels Cry", much less write the accompanying short story, "When An Angel Cried". I had carried the song with me for the better part of 20 years before I ever recorded it. It’s a dark theme, and I didn’t want people thinking I considered myself some kind of authority on the matter, because I’m not. Although like most of you, I do have some pretty strong opinions about the subject.

         My wife, Cyndi, has always been pretty descriptive when she tells a story. She doesn’t get in too big of a hurry and pays attention to details. In truth, she can tell me the story line about a movie she saw, and I usually don’t even feel like I need to see it any longer. So, when she told me about her own mother being abused after divorcing her biological father, it was like standing in the kitchen with all of the broken glass.  We hadn’t been married long at all when she brought all of those terrible details to life. I remember it was a weekday probably around 5:30 p.m. She was making dinner while I sat in the living room fiddling around with an Am chord. As I played, I thought about what it must have been like to be in her shoes. It didn’t seem fair to me that her young life had been altered in such a way -- that her loving, Christian home was turned upside down simply because of some terrible decisions by one person. But, it happens in millions of homes around the globe, and I suppose all we can do is try to break free from the chain of events and make a pact with ourselves to never be part of the problem.

         As I began writing the song, I wrote pretty much what Cyndi had told me. But, by the time I got to the bridge, a different character took over the story line. I didn't want my wife to re-live those experiences over and over again. So I decided to give the abused woman in the song more strength and common sense than Cyndi had been forced to witness first hand.   

         Cyndi put the video together herself last year. She told me where to stand, what to do, and where to look. She brought the actors into our home and shot their parts. She had scouted other locations, but it felt odd asking people if we could shoot a spousal abuse video in their home because it “just felt right”.

         By the time Cyndi edited the video, I had written most of the short story in my mind, and all I needed to do was write it down. I wanted to keep the story kind of barren the same way we had approached the recording of the song. Cyndi has ways of “classing” things up when she touches them. I have watched the video several times, and I always seem to see something else that she allowed to stay in a shot that’s significant in some way.

         I’m not in any way qualified to tell any woman what she should do if she finds herself in an abusive situation. But I believe I do have the right to say that everyone matters and no woman deserves to be treated badly. I have told this to my own daughters over and over again. I will never understand why anyone would stay in such a dark situation.

         I guess I just now realized all I can do is write about how I composed the song and wrote the short story. This is just one of those really heavy topics I don’t know how to approach... one of the many things that shouldn’t be in our society.

         Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at www.Facebook.com/ScottConerMusic, www.YouTube.com/user/ScottConer, and www.ScottConer.com. Follow Scott at www.Twitter.com/ScottConer.

The Perfect Song

By Scott Coner

Country Artist (and Proud Father)

            Twenty years ago this weekend, my first daughter was born. I was honestly in shock as all of the evidence of my wife’s very large stomach finally came into fruition. You see, I wasn’t really prepared for much of anything at that particular point in my life. I remember the day we were to bring her home from the hospital. I was supposed to go outside and bring the truck around to the front doors of the hospital and pick up Cynthia and the new human that I didn’t really know very well yet. I remember realizing I didn’t know how to put together a child's car seat and freaking out in front of everybody as I slammed the box on the sidewalk possibly screaming out words that didn’t match my adorable character.

            My fingers were wrapped around the steering wheel for all it was worth as we drove away from the nurses that had been helping Cyndi and me. I looked over to my right every now and again and could barely comprehend that this tiny humanoid was going to be part of my life as long as I lived. We stopped at my mom and dad’s before we went home to show my mom what I had made. We were all kind of spellbound as this tiny, skinny little baby opened her charcoal eyes. I never saw it coming, but everything in me melted like candlewax. This very small version of me and my wife took hold of me at that moment and has never let go. All I can say is that I am so glad she did. She set the stage that would allow me to feel feelings inside myself that I didn’t know existed. The love that I have felt since that day has continued to amaze me. 

 Video: Happy 20th Birthday Emi

            Three years after Emily was born, we found out that we had another little girl on the way. I remember being scared that I wouldn’t have any love left for her because Emily Sae already owned it all. But as I said, because of Emily, my heart had been conditioned to love the next baby every bit as much as the first one.

            I had started writing “The Perfect Song” as I sat on our bed watching Emily lie there as I played guitar. I must have set the song aside for quite a while, but I finished it sitting cross-legged next to my youngest daughter Taylor’s crib. I never planned on doing anything with the song, because it was so specifically about my own daughters. But, Cyndi has been making this “slide-show” for Emily’s birthday this weekend with the song as a backdrop, and I just wanted to share it with you. A lot of things are changing with my music very soon, and I don’t know how much longer I will be free to release little songs like this. The thing is, I know the song isn’t something that will speak to everyone. But it might speak to you in some way. I guess most of us have watched our kids play in the leaves or run across the yard as the sunshine danced across their hair. Those are the moments that God allowed me to have that I’ll always hold in my heart. My daughters have defined the man that I have become. So, as I’m driving to Wilmore, Ky., this weekend to see her on her birthday, I hope you can take a few minutes and allow me to share with you the story about two little girls that have truly blessed me. They are my “Perfect Song”, something far, far better than anything I could ever hope to write. Happy Birthday, Emily Sae Coner. I love you. 

I Don’t Know What She Did to Deserve Me, But It Must Have Been Pretty Bad

            The first time I ever saw my wife Cyndi, I think I lost both of my shoes. I had never seen anyone or anything as pretty as her. She and I met at probably the worst time possible. We were both getting a divorce, and both of us probably had plans of moving on with our lives. But things don’t always work out as planned. They never did for me anyway.

            She and I have been together for over 21 years now, and these days I feel like I keep falling deeper for her. Honestly, I worry about it sometimes because I’m not sure that it’s healthy to want to be around someone as much as I do her. The thing is, I honestly worry about the day that I have to leave this world and I won’t have her by my side. If Heaven is perfect, I don’t know how it could be perfect if she’s not there with me.

            Through the years, I have written songs, written cards, and bought jewelry as well as flowers trying to remind her of my feelings. I will be the very first to acknowledge that she should have ended up with a much better looking, cooler and suave man. But the thing is, I’m quite the talker when I set my mind to it, and I put my mojo into overdrive as I talked her into marrying me. I don’t know exactly what I said, but it must have been brilliant. I lay in our bed this morning as the sun came up, and I marveled at her angelic beauty. I walked into the restroom to brush my teeth and chuckled as I looked in the mirror. She married a troll!

            Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, I was talking about how awesome it is to be married to Cyndi. She has changed me. She has gently made me want to be a much better man. She has encouraged me to be healthy. She has given me the power to believe in myself. She has given me two perfect little girls that are just as pretty as their mother. And she laughs at my incredibly stupid jokes almost every time. She loves country music, but she rocks to AC/DC. I’m telling you this woman is perfect. She and I enjoy coffee on the porch in the mornings when we both have time. We sit there staring out across the countryside talking about our kids or our parents. Our dog Maggie sits out there with us, and both barn cats come up to the house to hang out as well. Those mornings are some of my favorite times.

 

            I don’t know what the future holds. I’m sure there will be storms though. We will most likely feel the sting of death as it takes family members we have loved all of our lives. We will get older and start to fail ourselves. Yes, I’m sure those storms will come, but life has always been about receiving and losing, laughing and crying, living and then dying. I’m sure as long as I have her next to me that we can face it as it comes.

            To learn more about country artist Scott Coner, visit http://www.Facebook.com/ScottConerMusic, http://www.ScottConer.com, and http://www.YouTube.com/user/ScottConer.