I Wouldn't Change Much Even If I Could

      By Scott Coner

                                                                            Nashville Recording Artist, Songwriter, Performer, and Author  

     I couldn’t have met my wife at a worse time. But I did, and there wasn’t anything I could do about it. I fell all over myself for her and I was pretty sure if I didn’t have her by my side for the rest of my life, I didn’t care to go on. I was in the process of a divorce. She was in the same process. Man, it was just awful. I think everybody that knew us at the time had nothing encouraging to say about our state of affairs. It was embarrassing and I know it looked sketchy at best. The thing is, you don’t get to choose when or how certain things happen. You respond the best way possible and hope for the best. I remember pretty well the day I sat in a truck talking to Cyndi about how I saw things. I told her how much she meant to me. I tried to understand what she was going through. And we both were fully aware that everybody on our little world were staying up late talking badly about us. We both cared about what people thought. We didn’t want to disappoint anybody. But, like I’ve said, I was head over heals and there was no turning back. 

                                                                                                

                                    

     If there have been any issues in our marriage after all of these years, I assure you it has been my fault. If there has been anyone that has brought a level of integrity and beauty into my life, I can also assure you it was because of her. She taught me how to relax. She gave me children. She made our home look like something out of a magazine. And every time I look at her she still takes my breath away. So, after all the dust settled, I came out the winner by a very long margin. I didn’t deserve her. Yes, I’m aware. But, somehow, I got everything I could have ever imagined.      

     As she and I get older together, we talk about this next stage in life that is about to come upon us. Our daughters are grown and it won’t be long until it’s just going to be us. We will be “empty nesters” as they say. It scares us both a little. And we both talk about how quickly time seems to slide by without being noticed. If I could wish for one thing, I would wish for more time with her and the girls. It’s heartbreaking to realize in the not too distant future my life will be nearly over and I just don’t want to go. I’m not scared of dying, but I’m terrified of being without them.

               

     

     There have been moments I have been a total jerk. Those are the times and the memories that I hate the most. It’s true that you can’t take back things you do and say. I just wish it were possible because I would never do anything on purpose to hurt her or my family. As I get older, I begin to better understand that my life has been blessed from the start. I have had opportunities that others would have loved to have. I have walked away from more than most even dream of. And somehow, I still landed right side up. I don’t know how that happened, so I can’t explain it. I do know without any doubt at all that at this moment, I am very, very happy to have my life. I love how things have turned out and I don’t have regrets. I wouldn’t dare complain too much because I think it would fall on deaf ears anyway.

     

     I don’t have any real wisdom to pass along after living all of this life. I always tell young guys to wear good shoes because their knees will thank them later. I also tell anyone that will listen that they should eat well and not poison themselves with fast food. Other than that, make sure you get a woman like mine. If you can do that, you will want to be home every chance you get. You will walk around with a smile while everyone else wants to complain. And when you get older, you’ll be like me. You’ll want to live on forever because you are certain you have heaven right here on earth. You will lay in the dark of the night with a huge smile as you hold in your arms one of God’s greatest treasures. You will realize that you have everything worth having. While others stand in line to buy a lottery ticket, you can know you won a long time ago and you have no room or desire for anything more. 

                                                        Life is very cool.     

                                   

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Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at his music page. 

Shades of Blue and Gray

 By Scott Coner

                                                                            Nashville Recording Artist, Songwriter, Performer, and Author  

     To me, the beauty of art is what it represents. I don’t know very much about painting, or photos, or anything like that. I know what I like when I see it. I know I have never wished I had some paintings of soup cans on my wall. To be honest, I probably like the photos of my family on the walls around my house than anything else. Like they say, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. If you like something, isn’t that what matters most?

     I don’t paint pictures. I do take photos with my phone sometimes, but for my own enjoyment. I write songs. I hear melodies. I hear phrases. I search my little piece of the planet for songs. I consider myself a serious songwriter because I truly do apply myself to the craft. I don’t align myself with too many of the publishers that look around for yet another song that “feels” and “sounds” like the last song they had on the radio. I just trudge along doing what I do. No matter what anybody says, I will not chase a train that has already passed me. I think if you consider yourself any type of artist at all, then you have to be yourself. For instance, just because Van Gogh used blues and grays doesn’t mean another guy with a brush can bring out the same beauty using the same colors. And just because some other song talks about how “country” it is to drink whiskey and listen to a train, doesn’t mean I am drawn to that theme.

     I had a conversation recently with a man from Nashville that is involved in my music to some extent. He truly believes that in order to be viable in today’s market that you need to listen to and study the other writers of current radio releases. I think there is some merit to that approach. I do believe if you copy other music, you might actually achieve something. If you listen to twenty minutes of today’s country music, you might walk away believing this approach is pretty popular. But, that’s not how I want to work.

     I instead believe that any genre of music needs to come from somewhere close to the heart. I think it needs to feel good when you play it all alone with just an acoustic guitar or piano. I think it should take you somewhere in your mind. I like the “no-rules” approach to writing. I don’t have a pre-conceived idea of where I want to go with a song. I follow it. It doesn’t follow me. The music getting radio play is something I don’t spend a lot of time following either. I compare trying to figure it all out to understanding the highs and lows in the Wall Street market. I think if you stay true to your own sound, you might make some headway, but I’m not certain of this. When it’s all said and done, it only makes sense to do things your own way.

     I approach music the same way I try to approach life. I don’t compare myself to others. I am comfortable with who I am. I write from my point of view. I live by my rules, not someone else’s. And I strongly believe this is the direction I must take in order to be whole. Have you ever made the mistake of looking at someone else’s set-up and wished it could be yours? I have, but thankfully I came to my senses pretty quickly. I have had some success with my music, but not enough to fulfill me. I have had visions of where I want to go, and I will follow those visions all the way to the end. Like they say, the destination isn’t the fun part. It’s the journey. I have weak moments. I have times when I wish I hadn’t picked up that first guitar. But, I am what I am. We are who we are.

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Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at his music page. 

   

The Process of Writing

By Scott Coner

Nashville Recording Artist, Songwriter, Performer, and Author

     Writing songs is like trying to find a four- leaf clover in a hay field. If you search all afternoon, you probably won’t come across one. But if you don’t look too hard, it will find you. Looking back over the many songs as well as attempts at songs I have written, that seems to apply. I have got up early in the morning with nothing on my mind but writing. I put my most comfortable jeans and shirt on. I have a nice hot cup of coffee. And I sit somewhere looking blankly at a piece of paper with a guitar in my lap with nothing coming to me. On the other hand, I can get busy with life and ideas just come naturally.

Still shot of Scott Coner and Carol Chase during their "Whiter Shade of Pale" cover duet

     Carol Chase and I write together quite a bit when she isn’t on the road with Skynyrd. She may show up with a piece of a song she has written on the road. Or, I may show up with some music and an idea. We have even been “Skyping” to firm up material as we get close to a recording date. She has been writing professionally longer than I have. She has had songs recorded by Ronnie Millsap, Pam Tillis as well as others. She has recorded a song that was used on “Every Which Way But Loose.” And she has done back up vocals not only with Lynyrd Skynyrd, but George Jones, Pam Tillis, and many more legends. She understands the concept of writing a song. She has introduced me to the idea of shutting the world off, sitting in a room with many ideas at the same time and writing. She and I have actually spent whole days together and written as many as three songs in a single afternoon. At the end of it all, I can only describe the feeling as “purged” or “cleansed”. I’m not sure which.

     As far as I am concerned, music has been like a therapy to me. Without realizing what I was doing, I have gone deep into my own mind and stepped out with messages I didn’t even know where there. I think it is the process of turning off part of your mind while turning another part on that actually takes place. It all began while I was just a kid. I think I wrote songs because I didn’t play other artists songs very well. It was early on in my playing career that my limitations were what propelled me to be imaginative with what few chords that were at my disposal.

Scott Coner and Carol Chase during a writing session

     Lately, I have been working on a book called, “In Case I’m Not Around.” In the last chapter, I list all of the songs I have written so far and included the process or idea behind each song. I have done this more for my daughters than for anyone else. I just wanted them to understand why I chose to write certain things I guess. As I have worked out the list and went over so many songs, I can see the parts of me that showed themselves when I wasn’t looking. Words or phrases that have been used in my family for years have shown up in songs. As I have allowed my mind to tether out in the abyss, I found that I wasn’t really out there too far, to begin with. I am simply a product of my family. My little town, my friends, past relationships, loss and happiness all show up in the music. I have always wanted to keep my music as down to earth as possible. I don’t use a computer to find a word that rhymes or works well with another. If I don’t have the word or phrase right away, I simply wait for it to come. If someone happened to come across me while I was writing, they would probably think I had lost my mind. I will sit and play the same lines over and over until the right part comes. I may fill a void with a “dummy” line until the proper one shows itself. Like I say, I have been in the clover fields before and came up with nothing at the end of the search. But the search is part of the blessing itself. If you have ever been on a beach early in the morning looking at the sand for shells, you must know what I’m talking about. That time spent along the water's edge listening to the tide, feeling the warm sun and wind is never wasted time. 

At the end of the search, you may come up empty handed, but even then, you know you had a memorable moment that was worth the walk.    

 

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Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at his music page. 

Jackrabbits Straight Outta Compton

 By Scott Coner

Nashville Recording Artist, Songwriter, Performer, and Author

 

     Today was different than many days in my life. I went to bed last night knowing that as soon as the sun came up my entire day could be focused on music.  I have been in need of some quiet time to be simply alone and focus on getting the songs ready for this upcoming tour. I wanted to think about each song and how it could be placed into the set. I want to be certain that the songs don’t all stay in one specific chord or theme, or “feel”. I want each song to have a purpose for being there, and I don’t want any wasted movement. I have seen my share of shows through the years where I have been bombarded with a quick look back at most of the popular songs for the artist, “But tonight we want to share a boatload of new material you have never heard before.” I don’t want to do this, even though I will be playing in areas that aren’t familiar with my music. What I will do to make sure the listener has a good time is to include songs from his or her past. I want to push those pleasure buttons with songs that excite the soul a little bit and make you smile. 

     This concept sounds pretty easy. It did to me anyway. At least until I remembered I don’t have a full band on this trip and I might need a few pole dancing jack rabbits in order to keep everyone’s attention. The whole idea was going to work until I realized that although rabbits are insanely sexy creatures, they simply don’t have the proper grip to dance and spin around a pole. I also understand that they can be very rude and demanding and your not supposed to look directly at their ears, or it is considered a threat. And things go south from there because you never feel at ease around a rabbit that would just as soon kick you in the private areas as look at you. Who wants that right? I know I don’t.

     Sorry, I got off topic for a second. Anyway, I want the songs to be thematically aligned with the lights and the video above the stage. I want the people that are kind enough to show up to know that they are about to go somewhere cool without even leaving their seat. Now understand that I am in no way trying to say that I am the golden ticket to musical nirvana. But what I am trying to say instead, is that I have spent my life loving and thinking about music. I believe I have considered nearly everything. I don’t want pre-climactic parts bringing the observer up and down all night. Instead, I want that person, every single individual, to take a trip into their own past and feel emotions that they haven’t felt for a long time. Remember that time you talked to that certain person in the hallway at high school and you couldn’t do much but stand there and look goofy? I want you to feel that again for just a minute. Do you ever think about where you were the first time you heard “The Dance”? What about some Marshal Tucker? Tim McGraw? Hey, what about this new guy they call Scott Coner? He is such a nice guy. If you don’t believe me, just ask his mom…

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Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at his music page. 

What If It Changed You Somehow?

 By Scott Coner

Nashville Recording Artist, Songwriter, Performer, and Author

 

     Well, it has finally happened after all of this time, all of these years. I have become a cover artist. Well, sort of. When I agreed to work with the folks out of Nashville on my tour, one of the things I had to agree to do was music that wasn’t mine. I have to admit that as a songwriter, this wasn’t originally what I was looking to hear. I wanted them to tell me that people were going to be knocked out by my original sound and everything was going to be on my own terms including not having yellow M&M’s in my dressing room.

     So after months of starting and stopping the process of learning other artist’s songs, I have pretty much settled on the sets. I think it is important, to be honest, and tell you why I don’t do many cover songs. The fact is, I’m not usually very good at doing them. It isn’t personal against anyone. I have spent most of my life writing songs, and I am not very effective when you take me out of my own little box. I remember as a kid when I played in different garage bands I failed miserably at trying to sound like someone or something that I’m not. It’s not that I didn’t try. It’s just that I wasn’t one of those fortunate guys that sounded like any of the big names back then.

     I don’t know how many songs I have combed through trying to find what I wouldn’t single-handedly destroy. I have looked all over the map trying to find songs that people in the audience will recognize and hopefully relate to. In doing this, I have found a lot more than I ever bargained for. I have worked through songs that I couldn’t actually add, but I fell in love with just the same. I have also found artists that I may have only known a little bit about, and now I find myself thinking about their sound quite a bit. One of those artists is Eric Church. I truly like his writing, and I also like how he is recording his music. I have added his song, “Wrecking Ball” to my set list. I wasn’t sure if I should because it is obviously a personal song for him. But the deal breaker was my wife. She is the one that brought me a handful of his songs to check out. Her opinion matters quite a bit you understand. Another artist that I would never have dreamed of covering was Tim McGraw. I had been in Nashville recently working on music with Carol Chase and she kept on playing one of his songs when we weren’t writing. I went home and checked out one of his older songs called, “Live Like You Were Dying” and honestly, I sat at my kitchen table alone in tears as I worked on the song. Obviously, I had heard the song and liked it before. But as I looked at the lyrics and put myself in the song, I found it to be a truly beautiful piece I have made a special note to myself to try not to screw that song up. It doesn’t deserve anything but respect. 

     I remember hearing a Mike Wanchik interview years and years ago when he was talking about working on, “The Lonesome Jubilee” album that John Mellencamp released in the late eighties. During the interview, I think I remember him talking about John demanding that each player in the band learn 100 songs from the 1960’s, and I believe that he also insisted that each player becomes proficient with another instrument as to add to the recording of the upcoming “Jubilee” album. Obviously, he was on to something. I have tried to approach what I am going through the same way. I never actually asked for this, but it’s funny how you get the true privilege to experience certain things if you will just try to be open. Working on this music has opened my mind in ways I never expected. I just want people that take time out of their lives that come see me to enjoy their evening and hopefully be touched in a way that may be new to them. Like I have said, I want to build the show around the listener. I want that man or woman to come and think about their world. I want those songs to reach out and touch them the same way they have affected me. I don’t know if everyone listens to music like me, but there are a lot of songs out there that I put myself into when I listen. It isn’t unlike a short film. I may not actually find myself in the vision, but if the story and song are strong, I certainly see and feel something different. That moment changes me somehow and I never forget where I was at when it occurred. I don’t think I could ever ask for more. You know to be a part of something like that would be the best possible outcome for someone like me. I find myself looking at the names and faces of people that listen to my music on social media. Early on, I was just writing my blogs and posts, and my publicist would take it from there. My wife and daughters have brought things to my attention, and it has been a good thing for me. I think as a songwriter your one true desire isn’t really to be seen. Instead, the songwriter wants their words and music to touch someone in such a way that they become different. To me, when it comes to music that is all that there is.   

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Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at his music page.