Chiseled In Stone or Maybe Just Written In Crayon

  By Scott Coner

                                                                            Nashville Recording Artist, Songwriter, Performer, and Author  

    We all leave a legacy. So, I would imagine it is better to plan the one that we’d like to deliver rather than just leave a few faded memories. The choices we make right now inside of these very moments may be the ones that end up mattering the most. Where do you stand with the ones that matter most in your life? Do you still have time to talk to your parents? Have you let your friends know that they matter to you? Have you tried to do what has always lived deep inside of you? These are just a few of the things that come to mind when I consider what a legacy means to me.

     One of the things I love about my life is the people I get to meet. My wife and I have talked for hours upon hours with Carol Chase about her life. She was just a young girl when she arrived in Nashville with her own dreams. She had left a little town in North Dakota to build her legacy. Because of her inner strength, she has written music for legendary artists. She has worked with George Jones and Ronnie Millsap and many others. For the last 27 years, she has traveled the world with Lynyrd Skynyrd. Lately, she and I have been writing and recording together. All told, I’d say she has built a legacy successfully.

     Very recently, I have had a few phone conversations with Beverly Gosdin Knight. She is the widow of Vern Gosdin. She has told me about some of the hard times she and Vern endured during the early stages of their life together. She was right there with him as he gave the world some of the most powerful country music ever recorded. Through her eyes, we will soon be able to see the world she and Vern shared together. She has just finished her life story, and I believe it is going to be something truly worth reading when it hits the stores very soon. She is a strong woman that has built her legacy.

     I have a friend named Kenny in Nashville that owns and operates a successful studio. Lately, he and I have been working together on some of my music, and I have found him to be the kind of guy I need to listen to. He has worked on the west coast but was drawn to Nashville years back. The thing about Kenny is he digs into a song like no other. Several times over he has forced me to re-consider my delivery of a song with pretty special end results. My wife has had the good fortune of seeing me freak out as I have tried to re-learn a song that I wrote in order to put proper emphasis on certain words. Kenny has given me some of the best players on the planet to work with. (I’m talking over 100 million in sales type of players) He is strong enough to challenge me without blinking when I need to do better, and I respect that. But what I respect most is the fact that he has built his legacy squarely on what he has a special gift for. He has made a difference in a huge industry.

     In the coming weeks, I am going to begin writing more about these people as well as others. I want you to be given an insight on some of the things I see with my eyes. I have written weekly blogs for well over a year now, but most of them have been about me, or my opinions. I’d like to share some of my friends with you. I want us all to better understand just how important each of our lives truly can be. God gave us these heartbeats. He sent His Son down here to die for our salvation. I’d say the least we can do is live this time that we have to the best of our ability. We don’t know what’s around the corner.

     Again, each of us has something to share, something to leave behind. Soon, we are going to put a link up on my web site. It will be a place for you to share bits and pieces of your legacy and your life with others. I will do my best to bring good examples from my world. I would love it if you did the same. If we connect the dots, it’s pretty easy to see that we are all connected in this life.  

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Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at his music page.         

The Chicken and the Ant

  By Scott Coner

                                                                            Nashville Recording Artist, Songwriter, Performer, and Author  

     Life lessons have a way of staying with us. Sometimes we forget about them, and they lay in wait until they need to be applied. Some of my own lessons come to mind. How about the time I asked a lady when “she was due” when she wasn’t due at all? Or what about the time I played on the men’s baseball team at church when I had never played a game in my life. The truth was, I didn’t know where to throw the ball, where to stand, or what to say to cover my embarrassment. Lesson learned I guess, but it would have been good to know that quite a few people show up to watch the game.

     When I was a little kid, my mom used to dress me in these weird outfits she called, “sun suits.” Best that I can remember, they weren’t anything more than shorts with a built in suspender type deal. The reason I say this, is to describe the time I was at the corner of my grandparent's yard in Florida playing with my match-box cars. Things seemed pretty innocent with no problems on the horizon. Just a kid in his sun-suit imagining he was driving a miniature Mustang. I noticed a small ant climbing along my thigh before the gates of hell opened up. I smacked at the ant, and that must have been a distress signal for all of the ants in Florida to bite my little boy parts in unison. There were several life lessons to be learned that day. First of all, those strange little sun suits are very hard to get off your body when your strapped in like a paratrooper. Secondly, when your parts are on fire, you need to have command of the English language so you can instruct your mom of the issue. And I would imagine another important lesson is to not find out you have turrets syndrome in front of your mom and both of her parents. They probably forget how cute you are. Yeah, that day was chalked full of little lessons.

     There was another time right around the same season of my life when I was savagely attacked by a rooster. My grandma had warned me not to be throwing rocks at the chickens, but I have never been a great listener. So, while the grown-ups are all inside having coffee, I found myself all alone throwing rocks at chickens because that’s the kind of kid I was. I was a terrible human being. Anyway, as I’m standing in the barn lot throwing rocks at the poultry, I look to my left as a very angry rooster is viscously flapping up my fat little leg. I was terrified. I tried to run, but the rooster was faster. I fell several times as I cried and screamed for my terrible young life. Was there a lesson learned? Not really a “life lesson,” but I wouldn’t throw rocks at chickens unless you’re wearing a full set of Car-Harts and running shoes. This might apply to glass houses too, if you happen to live in an aquarium.

     As we get older, I think it’s a natural thing to laugh at our little mistakes. We have hopefully evolved to some degree, but there is always room for improvement. I have learned not to play with ant- hills. I don’t throw myself into baseball games like I’m the great Bambino. And I avoid all eye contact with full-size ladies for fear of blurting out something insanely stupid. The thing is, I am still prone to doing and saying things I regret. If I have learned anything, I would truly hope I am finally smart enough not to say something that would hurt someone’s feelings. After all, it’s absolutely fine for me to share my own mistakes and make fun of myself. On the other hand, it’s never ok for me to hurt someone else’s feelings either by accident or on purpose. As I’ve gotten older, I have realized just how important every single person is in my world. Everyone I know truly has a reason for being there. It’s almost like every person is a puzzle piece. Many people have taught me some pretty applicable lessons in spite of myself. The most important one? I’m not sure, but maybe we shouldn’t take things so seriously.  

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Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at his music page.         

 By Scott Coner

Nashville Recording Artist, Songwriter, Performer, and Author 

     In many ways, I see my opportunity to sing and play music as an opportunity to help or challenge people to live their lives in a more challenging and fulfilling way. As I have said many times, we all have something that lives inside of us that should be shared with others. I don’t think it is by accident when I am given an opportunity to meet someone that has “went deep” and became who he was supposed to be rather than who he had allowed himself to become. I took a short vacation a few weeks back and met such a man in New Buffalo, Michigan.

   

     My wife usually puts our little excursions together, and she often hides a nice little surprise in there somewhere for us. If we are in Chicago, she will have us set up in some historical hotel near the water. If we are in Florida, I may find myself swimming with dolphins. And apparently, when I find myself in New Buffalo, I will find myself on a sunset sailboat cruise. I love this about her. She always finds a way to make even sweeter memories for our family.

     It was probably around 7 p.m. when we stepped on his boat. I had never been on a sailboat before so I tried to stay out of the way. I figured he would be busy pulling ropes on pulleys and trying to work with the wind. I was wrong about that. He knew perfectly well how to adjust for the conditions and allow for an incredibly smooth and peaceful ride. We probably sailed towards the sun for an hour or so before he and I began to talk. He put on an abstract collection of all types of music that was somehow connected to water and it was a nice change not to hear “Margaritaville” over and over. His name was Steve, and he was originally from that part of the world. He looked to be in his late thirties or possibly in his early forties. He was in good shape, had a nice tan, and took very good care of his boat. He told me that he had been in sales with his families company for years, but the company got sold, and he just didn’t have any passion for things in that field at all anymore. He knew he had to make some significant changes in order to be happy, so he took a giant step in faith. He said he had always been drawn to the water, and he decided to buy a sailboat. His plan was solid, although there were a few seasonal issues that slowed his business down in the late fall. In order to stay on track, he put his boat in storage every winter and went to Florida until spring. He had found work on someone else’s boat during that time, and it provided a nice change of pace for him.

     I think what I admired most about the man was his willingness to take a chance on himself. It was just him, the water, and faith. He had taken his dream and turned it into reality. His dream is allowing other families to make memories that they will never forget. In the midst of a problem he had found a way to see through it and take a completely different direction. I believe that because he was willing to take a chance, he was given an opportunity to do something more. He accomplished something far too may of us only think about. And his ability to share his joy of the water with others is opening eyes to countless other people along the way.

     Most of you know that I am basing my upcoming tour around “building a legacy.” My goal is to allow people the chance to look inward and strive for more than just the daily grind. This man, this sailor, is the type of legacy builder I am talking about.

     Don’t you want more? Do you ever have those, “what if” moments? Do you ever think about all of the desires that are deep within you but you just don’t know how to act on them? I think in order to be happy in this world we need to be who we really are. I believe that in order to maintain a long and quality relationship that you should never stop developing and changing toward what serves you better. By constantly challenging ourselves, we also inspire our children to never give up on their own dreams. I have allowed my wife and daughters to see me get knocked flat in the music business. They have seen my struggle and I have been open about my mistakes and disappointments. I wanted them to see me this way. I have always hoped that somehow they could learn some lesson in seeing their dad refuse to give up when times were hard and hurtful. Maybe, I have allowed them to see a fool. I hope not. But if I have, there was probably still a life lesson included in there somewhere.  

     As I write this article, Steve is surely on his sailboat floating quietly across the water. He is probably looking west, watching his sails, and giving someone the time of their life. I hope that he knows he is an inspiration to many of us. He cracked the mold. He found a way to become who he truly is, and who he is truly matters. He is making a contribution and building a legacy that will be talked about for many years to come.  As we sailed back to our dock that evening, “Brandy” by the band, “Looking Glass” was on his stereo.  Perfect.

Keep in touch!

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Scott Coner is a country singer-songwriter who has worked in the studio with legendary artists such as Tanya Tucker, T. Graham Brown and Charlie Daniels. You can learn more about him and hear his music at his music page.